While difficult to find nowadays, you should still be able to track down the Yggdra Unison drama CD for purchase online if you want to hear the accompanying audio!
This is a translation of the first three tracks, which make up the Kingdom of Fantasinia chapter. In it, we follow Yggdra along her storyline to bring peace back to the continent, by which I mean Mistel goes on a rampage and Fantasinia handles conflict the way that Fantasinia has always handled conflict.
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Kingdom of Fantasinia Chapter
Narrator: Long, long ago, when the continent was plunged into a maelstrom of war, a young princess threw herself into the center of the storm. Clasping in her hand the holy sword passed down for centuries through the royal family, a sword as tall as she herself, her name was…
Yggdra: I am Yggdra. Yggdra Yuril Artwaltz. To protect the kingdom from the invasion of the New Bronquian Empire, and to bring peace to this continent, I will definitely defeat Blazing Emperor Gulcasa myself. Justice lies with the Holy Sword Gran Centurio! …So, that being the case, let’s invade the empire right away! First, we shall capture Ft. Karona!
Durant: Please wait, Princess!
Yggdra: What is it, Durant?
Durant: The Royal Army has lost too many soldiers in battle with the empire. It is too dangerous to attack them head-on!
Yggdra: Then… we’ll have to come up with some sort of plan.
Cruz: In that case, I’ve got an idea! (Yes! I can’t believe it’s already time for me, the great revolutionary warrior Cruz, to spring into action!!) How ‘bout a night attack? We know the terrain around Karona pretty well, and I think I can spot us for a certain measure of sheer manpower…
Yggdra: Hmm… I can’t really come up with anything good…
Cruz: Ahaha… Even though I’m a commander, you’re going to ignore—
Durant: I think that it would be best to recruit powerful commanders in order to swell our ranks…
Yggdra: I understand. If we can recruit some good allies, then you will be able to show your true strength even more than before, Durant.
Cruz: I sure hope that I’ll at least be able to keep showing up…
Durant: It’s as you say, Princess! It’s terrible that we have so few commanders.
Cruz: Yyyyeah, I’m pretty sure I’m gonna get to appear less…
Mistel: Oh, Princess, you seem to be troubled!
Durant: Who goes there?!
Mistel: I’m Mistel! I’m just a housewife.
Durant: Why is “just a housewife” in a place like this…?! What are the guards doing?!!
Mistel: My, my! You must not be getting enough calcium, to be in such a poor temper! Here, have some goat milk!
Durant: Wah! Wh-what are you doi—mph?! *glug glug glug* Phwah! Ohh! This is quite delicious!
Mistel: That’s because this milk is fresh! Oh, and have some walnut bread too, if you like! Would you like some too, Princess? I have Sweetberry jam with me!
Yggdra: Sweetberry jam?! I’d love some!
Cruz: No, not “I’d love some”!! Even if we’re going to ignore how you got in here, what does some housewife want with us?! If you’re just handing out refreshments, do it someplace else!
Mistel: Oh, that’s right! I’ve come to help you out, if I can!
Yggdra: To help us out?
Mistel: The empire’s attacks grow fiercer by the day! At this rate, my love will have no home to return to! As a housewife, I cannot sit idly by and allow such a thing to happen!
Durant: And so you mean to say that you came all this way to help us fight…?
Mistel: Oh, yes! I happen to be the granddaughter of a strategist named Bly who once commanded royal forces, and so in addition to my skills at housework, I have just a teensy bit of confidence in my combat prowess too!
Durant: Oh!! So you’re related to the genius tactician Bly…!
Cruz: No, no, no, I don’t care whose grandkid you are, I just can’t think that a housewife will be able to fight alongside the Royal Army! You better not sabotage my revolution!
Mistel: Oh, my, it seems you doubt the power of a housewife! Then, allow me to give you a direct, physical demonstration!
Cruz: Wh-what’s with that gigantic scythe?!!
Mistel: Oh, it’s just a little harvest sickle!
Cruz: No way! I can’t believe that’s just for harvesting!!
Mistel: Oh, my!
Mistel: My, my!
Cruz: Guaahaahhh!!! M… My revolution…
Mistel: Oh, I’m so sorry, it looks like I overdid it a little!
Yggdra: Well done, Mistel-san! Please, fight alongside us!
Mistel: Thank you very much, Princess!
Durant: We’ve gained a truly reliable comrade. That was a wonderful scythe technique I would never have expected from an ordinary housewife!
Mistel: Well, technically, I am a full-time housewife.
Yggdra: We’re already off to such a good start, so let’s look for more new allies! Durant, do you have any ideas?
Durant: Around here, the most powerful fighters are Bandit King Ortega and Brigand King Dort.
Mistel: Such rowdy, unmannered gentlemen would never mix in with the Royal Army! My recommendation is the Silver Wolf, Milanor-san!
Yggdra: The Silver Wolf Milanor?
Mistel: They say he is a kind, brave, popular, wonderful gentleman active at the southern tip of the continent!
Durant: Hmm… If such a wonderful fighter were to join our ranks, then the empire would be nothing to fear!
Yggdra: Then, let us go! In search of Milanor-san!!
Mistel: With all my power as a full-time housewife, I will bring him into our ranks!
Cruz: Guys… listen to me… Now that she’s joined the Royal Army, there’s nothing I can say… that full-time housewife…
Narrator: And so, for the time being, the Royal Army travels towards the south of the continent.
Durant: Are you all right, Princess?!
Yggdra: Yes! Thank you, Durant…
Durant: This area is often called the Misty Mountain Range, and so the dangerous mountain trails will continue for a while… Please, be careful of your footing.
Mistel: It’s also a bandits’ nest, and I hear that the people of this area cannot live in peace and comfort…
Yggdra: We can’t abandon them! In the name of the Holy Sword, to bring peace back to the continent! Let us deal with the bandits!!
Durant: Understood, Princess. I will grant your wish to bring prosperity to the people! All troops! We depart now to exterminate the mountain bandits! Follow me!!
Mistel: As a housewife, I mustn’t lose to you! Here I goooooo!!
Bandit: It’s the Royal Army! They up and declared war on us for no reason!!
Yggdra: Bandits, please prepare yourselves! Because justice lies with the Holy Sword! COME NEAR ME, AND I’LL KILL YOU!!
Narrator: …and so, with Yggdra’s inspiration, the Royal Army freed the Lenessey Mountains from the bandits.
Durant: Princess! I have discovered treasure!
Yggdra: It’s an Upola Statue! Thank you, Durant!
Narrator: In order to recruit Milanor, they again headed south.
Durant: Princess! There are Skeletons lying in wait here! Please take care!
Yggdra: And there are Golems on the other side. What could be happening in this land?!
Mistel: I think that I heard that descendants of the same wizard have separated into the Black Rose and White Rose families and are fighting each other, or something…
Yggdra: That is simply too sad! Is there no way that we can have them make up?
Durant: I will definitely make your loving heart reach those two descendants! All ranks, attack!!
Mistel: As a housewife, I will physically teach you the importance of your relatives!!
Roswell: Wh-who on earth are you?!!
Rosary: Just whose side are you on?!!!
Mistel: Oh, my!!!
Narrator: …And so, the Royal Army intervened with the civil war in Verlaine Hills.
Durant: Ruler of the White Rose, Rosary-dono. Ruler of the Black Rose, Roswell-dono. Please leave your days of squabbling behind.
Mistel: Your ancestor would be so sad to see you dragging civilians into your fight.
Roswell: W-we get it, so move that scythe!
Mistel: Oh, my, how rude of me in front of such a lovely gentleman!
Rosary: Waaahh! Don’t swing that giant thing around!!
Mistel: Then, please shake hands to demonstrate your reconciliation!
Roswell, Rosary: ………
Mistel: Oh, goodness, no need to be embarrassed!!
Rosary: There’s… no helping it…
Mistel: There, now everyone is friends again!
Yggdra: With this, we have succeeded once more in resolving a war on the continent! Justice lies with the Holy Sword!!
Narrator: Having resolved the conflict between the two lords via use of brute force, the Royal Army…
Durant: Princess! I have discovered treasure!
Yggdra: It’s Frilly Lace! Thank you, Durant!
Narrator: …in order to actually recruit Milanor this time, headed towards the south of…
Nietzsche: Somebody heeeeeeeeelp!
Durant: You shall not escape, Undine!
Nietzsche: Waaaah! Nietzsche doesn’t wanna die!! Uwah!!
Mistel: Let’s bring the game of tag to an end, shall we, Miss Fishie?
Nietzsche: Nietzsche’s not a fishie!!
Yggdra: Prepare yourself! In the name of the Holy Sword, I will punish you!!
Kylier: Hey! What do you think you’re doing?!
Yggdra: Where did that voice come from?!
Mistel: Oh, my, I don’t see anyone! How mysterious…
Durant: Princess, look up!
Yggdra: —a Griffon Rider!
Kylier: That flag… so you’re with Fantasinia, that army that’s been terrorizing this region, huh?
Yggdra: How rude! We are fighting in the name of the Holy Sword, to bring peace back to this continent!
Kylier: All I see is a bunch of soldiers ganging up on an Undine, though.
Mistel: This is a grave misunderstanding! We heard that the Undines of this area are capturing humans to drain their blood, and so we only wanted to defeat them!
Durant: Please, understand our Princess’s desire to save the people of this land.
Nietzsche: Please save me, griffon lady! At this rate… they’re gonna eat Nietzsche!!
Kylier: E-eat you?!!
Mistel: I thought we could have a nice fish fry after we defeat them!
Kylier: That’s messed up, oba-san! I won’t let you do something like that on our turf!
Mistel: Oba-san?! What a rude little lady we have here! It looks like you require some punishment…!
Yggdra: If you stand in the way of justice, then there is no other recourse. We will simply strike you down as well!
Mistel: Oh, my, I’ve always wanted to try my hand at grilling a griffon!
Kylier: You’re gonna eat Al, too?!
Kylier: Don’t be scared, Al! Hang in there!
Mistel: I’m a housewife because I can skillfully use every instrument in front of me, young lady!
Kylier: Housewife, housewife… What’s that oba-san on about?!
Mistel: Again, so rude… I will have no mercy!
Nietzsche: Nietzsche doesn’t wanna get eaten!!
Kylier: There’s no way I can run, either! Let’s go, Al!
Yggdra: Come near me, and I’ll kill you!!
Durant: Princess, look out!
Kylier: That axe is…!
Milanor: Kylier, are you okay?!!
Kylier: Milanor! You came to save us!
Flunky: I’m here too!
Yggdra: Milanor…? Now where have I heard that before…
Mistel: Ah! (I’d plum forgotten, but… we came all this way to recruit Milanor-san! He’s younger than I expected, but… this housewife’s eyes can already clearly see him as a member of our commanders…!)
Milanor: You’re pointing a weapon at my precious comrade. I don’t know why, but first of all you better apologize!
Yggdra: Justice lies with this Holy Sword, the Gran Centurio! If anyone’s going to apologize here, it will be you people, for obstructing our justice!
Mistel: Excuse me, Princess, but I need to tell you something—
Milanor: That’s interestin’. In that case, all we can do is test our different brands of justice in combat!
Yggdra: That’s right.
Mistel: Excuse me! Someone, please listen to—
Milanor: Awright! Time to go to war!!
Flunky: Boss, now you’re all fired up, let’s do that! That thing!
Kylier: Ehhh? Do we really have to?
Flunky: We’ve been practicing, and this is a great opportunity!
Milanor: Sheesh… Whatever! Let’s do it!
Yggdra: It looks like they’re planning something!
Mistel: That’s perfect. Princess, listen—
Durant: Princess, this is a chance for us to take the advantage!
Yggdra: That’s right! All troops—
Milanor: Wait just one minute!!
Yggdra, Durant, Mistel: Huh?
(muffled guitar solo)
Milanor: An’ a one, two…
Milanor, Kylier, Flunky: Mi!
Flunky: MIracle behold, the brave warriors who gather under the crescent moon!
Milanor, Kylier, Flunky: La!
Kylier: LAnce of glistening power, may its afterimage sear into your retinas!
Milanor, Kylier, Flunky: Nor!
Milanor: NOR do we neglect the search of treasure; once we pick a target, we never let it go! That’s us—
Milanor, Kylier, Flunky: The Milanor Thieves!
Milanor: Come forward if you wanna die!
Flunky: —See, wouldn’t it be perfect if we had bombs to go off at that part?
Milanor: The explosions were all in your imagination?!!
Kylier: That really is embarrassing… Just look at them, they thought it was creepy!
Yggdra: Wh… what was that…? That’s so cool!!!
Milanor: She’s really into it!!!!!!
Yggdra: I see, I see! The beginning of your lines started with Mi, La, and Nor! We should do it too!
Durant: Wait, Princess! We are the Fantasinian Royal Army!
Mistel: Oh, my! It seems our serious Durant doesn’t like that idea!
Durant: Isn’t “Fantasinia” much too long? That’s seven kana! Including the little “a”.
Mistel: You’re serious about everything, aren’t you…?
Yggdra: Durant, if you combine the little “a” with the “fu” and keep it as a “fa”, that’s only six kana!
Durant: Of course! Now we’re one syllable down! That’s my Princess!
Yggdra: Then, let’s come up with a good introduction, and prepare for battle!
Mistel: Battle…? Oh, that’s right! Princess, he’s Milanor-san! Milanor the Silver Wolf!
Yggdra: The Silver Wolf…?
Mistel: I’m telling you, he’s—
Kylier: This is ridiculous.
Nietzsche: Then, Nietzsche will take this chance… to escape!!
Durant: Ahh! Princess, the Undine!
Nietzsche: Have a good fight, Milanor-onii-chan! The scythe oba-chan is super scary, but don’t lose!
Mistel: What did you just call me, Miss Fishie?
Kylier: That’s right, Milanor, that oba-san is no ordinary lady!
Mistel: You said it again, didn’t you, young lady?!
Milanor: Is she really that strong?
Yggdra: Mistel-san? What did you want to say about him?
Mistel: Ah! Oh, that’s right, Princess, that man is—
Yggdra: That man is?
Milanor: I get it! So that oba-san’s their ace, huh? Okay, oba-san, I’m gonna take you down!!
Mistel: ………That man is the leader of the thieves that have been ransacking this land! He is our—no, the entire continent’s hated enemy, whom we must defeat at all costs!
Yggdra: Oh, of course! Then, in the name of the Holy Sword, let us defeat them for the people’s sake!
Milanor: Let’s go get ‘em, everybody!
Narrator: …and so, the curtain fell on their battle.
Yggdra: Come near me, and I’ll kill you!
Milanor: Dammit… I let my guard down… Oba-…sa…
Mistel: There, spring cleaning all finished!
Yggdra: Justice lies with the Holy Sword!!!
Durant: With your power, Princess, peace has come to half the continent. We’ve reached the southern tip of the continent, so now all that remains is Bronquia!
Yggdra: Southern tip… I wonder? Didn’t we have some objective for coming here?
Durant: Come to think of it…
Mistel: Ahhh! Princess, I just remembered that there’s supposed to be a good item called the Iron Choker hidden around here!
Yggdra: We mustn’t pass that up!
Durant: Then, I shall go in search of it! Wait for just a moment!
Yggdra: I’m counting on you, Durant!
Durant: Leave it to me, Princess!
Mistel: Do your best! Ohohohoho!
Narrator: …and so, the Royal Army’s battle in the name of justice continues.